I really never thought the day would come where I'd be writing my last weekly email as a missionary, but alas here we are. It really feels like I was just walking into the MTC... where does the time go?! Everyone says that time goes by really fast on your mission, but it really just hit me that my time as a full time missionary is coming to an end in just a few days. The past few weeks have been extremely bittersweet. I've been reflecting on the things I've learned, the joy I've felt, the people I've met and I feel a lot like Ammon did at the end of his mission. I cannot say the smallest part which I feel :,)
I have changed so much these past 18 months, but I don't think that the whole point of coming to the South, putting my life, my will, my desires, etc, on the altar was to only help me change while on the mission. I think that the whole point of this experience was to allow me to become converted enough to the Lord and His gospel so that this isn't my spiritual peak in life. I mean, I don't plan on having my most spiritual experiences on my mission! I plan on growing more! There's plenty more changing I need to do if I want to be like my Savior! I have so much more to learn! I mean, I am only 20. There's so much more ahead of me. I really think that these next 18 months are way more important than the past 18. That's when I get to prove to myself and to the Lord that I love Him enough to keep changing, keep growing, and keep learning the rest of my life. The nametag didn't make me a disciple of Jesus Christ, my love for Him and my desire to follow Him did!
Somethings I've learned on my mission that I want to share with yall is that everyone has talents and gifts from our Father in Heaven. We all have worth! We all were worth the sacrifice of our Savior Jesus Christ, both to our Father and the Savior Himself. The Atonement is for our everyday life. It's something that can carry us, cleanse us, enable us to do hard thing, and bring us joy out of all circumstances. Life is meant to bring us joy and life is way better when we are striving to feel it. It's not the nametag or the mission that changes us, Jesus Christ does!
This week has been really emotional lol. I've said goodbye to people who have treated me like family and loved me hard and unconditionally. It's made me realize how great the gift if charity really is and it's helped me realize the love God has blessed me to feel for the people of Louisiana and Mississippi. I love these people with my whole heart! They've taught me more than I have taught them, hands down. I'm grateful for the relationships I've built here in Goula and everywhere I've served! Other than my own testimony and growth, those relationships are my favorite take aways from the mission. Whether or not your a missionary, love lots and love hard! It's always worth it :)
But, with all this sappy stuff, I do want to share some highlights from this week! I was able to go on exchanges with my ex-comp sister Riddle and it was a blast! We have the same skirt so we has to match! But the best part of the whole exchange was being able to teach 5 people the message of the Restoration in 4 lessons throughout our day! It was a tender mercy to be able to bear my testimony to those people and to feel the Spirit work through me. We don't bear our testimony that much at home! I'm not quite sure how, but I think I want to change that :) I love bearing my testimony of the gospel, especially the Restoration! So that was a tender mercy. The Waldrops came down the next day to say goodbye to me before I left the mission for good and I was just overwhelmed with love for them. They're like my family and I'm so grateful I've met them. We had a blast together and went out to lunch then checked out this alien abduction spot that apparently exists in Goula? So that was sick! I got to pet a massive dog and that made me literally giddy! One of the best parts of my week and probably my mission was saying goodbye to Dan and Leah, our preacher friends. We were able to talk about his beliefs and what it means to be saved and the Spirit was really strong. But as we were talking about how the Lord put us in each other's lives, Dan started to cry and obviously that made me and Sister Nelson start to cry! They mean so much to me and I know that God blessed me by having them placed in my life. They've taught me more than anyone I think. I'm so blessed to know them.
I guess this is officially it! I have loved my mission more that I thought was possible and I've given my all to the Lord. It has been the biggest source of joy, yet. I love my Savior with my whole being and I know He has carried me the past 18 months. He has become tangible and real to me and I can say he truly is my best friend. I love yall so much! Thanks for taking this journey with me :) I have felt your love and your prayers all along the way :) See yall soon!
Love always,
Sister Crouch
